So yeah, I went more or less a whole day without posting anything. I didn’t really NaNo either.
Behold the power of hunger. Also video games.
Whereas Tuesday was a day full of words and laundry, yesterday was full of Reckoning. And eventually bolognese, which I fed to a couple of friends who came by. All in all a fun, but entirely unproductive day.
And so I wanted to ensure I don’t go two days in a row, by posting right after midnight. Cuz that’s just how I roll.
One of the biggest hurdles that my writing has always had is that part right after the introduction of characters, around the time conflict starts happening and the story needs to go in a direction. I hate that part.
It’s the decision making. I like to let characters do their own thing, but eventually as the author I have to impose conflict into their lives. And that always feels forced. Writing it feels forced, contriving it feels forced…it’s usually around the time that I give up and start on another story because if this one tanked out that early it must not have been that good an idea.
But the more it happens the more I start to feel like it’s just another manifestation of the fear of…whatever it is, failure, writing a bad story, whatever. Either way I think it’s less a problem with the ideas or the stories and more a problem with my ability to maintain some discipline long enough to finish a draft to actually edit an entire piece instead of just the chunks I’ve already written.
Though sometimes fleshing out the parts that are already written helps create momentum that can continue further than the original drafting did.
And sometimes it’s just another way to stall. So I’ve been running over ideas in my head all day. Trying to find a direction to move the characters in just so they can move forward enough to get somewhere else in the story. So far I’ve not come up with much. But there’s still several hours before daylight, so hopefully I’ll manage to get something done before I have to go to bed.